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Thread: The Move

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Sep 2017

    Default The Move

    Very interesting post by Moses over at zenzone. He spilled the beans on his life story. Damn, divorce is tough, but it seems he was devastated by it. I remember him telling this once before, but that time he started out with 4 million not 3 million.

    I'm going from memory about something I've tried very hard to put behind me. I remember hitting the $1 million mark at age 45 which was about 10 years late of my goal. Then I was amazed that it went from $1m to $3m in just 5 years. There were a lot of moving targets but I don't think it ever reached $4m. I'd have to go look it up and it's something I try to forget. For instance, the house on the golf course jumped from $400K to a mil in a year. But we didn't sell until after my oldest graduated HS and it was determined the youngest wanted to move to another HS. We got $650K net and then bought the next house for $555k to begin downsizing. Plus living on that golf course was like living in a glorified prison. So many rules. I still remember the check for $555k. It was valued at $750K and I remember saying this needs to be a 10 year plan before I wrote the check. I knew volatility was forthcoming. It lasted two years.

    I'm not devastated by the divorce. If I think about it, which I try not to do, it's very frustrating to know that 25 years of my life was wasted. My kids? Sure I miss them. But I think you know that the most difficult job as a parent is to let them go become adults. It's like a pitcher in baseball. You wake up everyday and feel as though you need to pitch a perfect game. Then when they become adults, you sit in the bullpen, and sorta hope you're not called on to come in the game.

    The year 2010 was by far the most difficult of my life. You think you are so close to the finish line and wham someone says the race starts over.
    Ever had the kid(s) that would hang around the house you just knew were a bad influence? In my case, that kid was their mom. The people from that year was as if they were helping you up and pushing you back down both at the same time. But it was the isolation in that house that was most devastating. Everyone and darn near everything was gone except me. It was like walking thru a cold dark gym after a game had been played.

    The house sold in March 2010. The real estate agent screwed up and wrote it as a non contingency. April 5, after 25 years, I had two choices, I could either take the ex's stuff to her or she would come and get it. I thought what the hell. Two questions like that just 45 days from our 25th anniversary. Anyway, I took her the stuff. The deal was scheduled to close that following Monday. So we have a big sale and sold everything of value that weekend. Everyone figured I'd back out of the deal somehow. Logic being, I had the most to lose. But I was more concerned about getting my daughter a place so she could finish her sophomore year in college. Now Monday comes, and their house didn't sell, so they are backing out of the deal. In addition, they were members of my church and my wife wanted to sue. Talk about adding embarrassment to humiliation.

    So here my daughter and I are in this big empty house. It was tough on her so she went to spend the summer with her sis in Arizona before starting school in the fall in Nebraska.

    That house was like a bad omen or something. In 13 years, 4 families lived in that house, in a neighborhood where houses rarely sell. All 4 ended in divorce and apparently the one before us ended with the husband committing suicide. I didn't know this until years later. My daughter came to visit me in Reno and brought one of her friends who lived in that community his entire life. He said "oh, you lived in the haunted house." Everyone has known that for years. Everyone, except me I guess.
    Last edited by Moses; April 29th, 2019 at 01:14 PM.

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