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Thread: Nice bible words of wisdom

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    Default Nice bible words of wisdom

    The Raunchies1 TWO.doc
    Now how much wine would it take for you to have no idea it was your daughter you... errr... twice?
    Any bible bashers opening this, remember, this is the Zen Zone.
    Last edited by Katweezel; March 12th, 2009 at 08:27 AM. Reason: Wise words from the bible
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    Quote Originally Posted by Katweezel View Post
    Attachment 2143
    Now how much wine would it take for you to have no idea it was your daughter you... errr... twice?
    Any bible bashers opening this, remember, this is the Zen Zone.
    I don't think it was endorsing the behavior, merely narrating it. Much of the Old Testament is this way. The reader is supposed to be apalled by the behavior.

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    I reckon NFL players are twice damned. Not only do they work on the sabbath, but they handle the skin of a pig.
    Everyone knows Christians get to pick and choose which Old Testament laws apply today. Hence- homosexuality is still bad, but its now okay to eat shellfish, and it's no longer kool to sell your daughter into slavery.
    Only those who will risk going too far can possibly find out just how far one can go.


    We cannot direct the wind, we can only adjust our sails.

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    Quote Originally Posted by shadroch View Post
    I reckon NFL players are twice damned. Not only do they work on the sabbath, but they handle the skin of a pig.
    Everyone knows Christians get to pick and choose which Old Testament laws apply today. Hence- homosexuality is still bad, but its now okay to eat shellfish, and it's no longer kool to sell your daughter into slavery.
    Jews do the same. It is up to the individual to decide which parts of the Law should still apply to modern man (Thou shall not murder, for example) and which ones no longer make sense in the world we must live in (Shabbat and kashrut, which are not universally observed.)

    But I don't need a Testament Old or New to tell me I don't want to pal around with homosexuals. They are loathed in cultures that never had the Judeo-Christian Bible. Hindus consider them sewer dwellers.

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    Default Egyptian biblical stallions

    Ezekiel 23.doc
    Now what could be more enticing to an ... eh, interested woman than a really hung Egyptian?
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    Default Sabbath footballs

    Quote Originally Posted by shadroch View Post
    I reckon NFL players are twice damned. Not only do they work on the sabbath, but they handle the skin of a pig.
    Everyone knows Christians get to pick and choose which Old Testament laws apply today. Hence- homosexuality is still bad, but its now okay to eat shellfish, and it's no longer kool to sell your daughter into slavery.
    The old testament makes it quite clear that only on certain occasions, it may be OK to handle the foreskin of a pig. This may be OK if you are removing its bladder, prior to a game. Camel bladders are too big. Sheeps' too soft. Pigs' are ideal footballs. The ancients knew this. I'm surprised you apparently didn't.
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    Default What to do if street gang attacks... get the bears

    We.doc
    Old testament attachment quote from Kings 2: 23 -24. Know any bear jockeys?
    Last edited by Katweezel; March 19th, 2009 at 09:59 AM.
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    Default old and new laws

    As far as modern christians and picking what laws to follow it is not up to us. The new testament and Jesus spelled out clearly what to follow. The Jewish people are a different story since they don't believe in the new testment or Jesus. It's never an option to choose which you follow but sadly some try justify their actions by choosing. We as christians will be judged by our faith and actons and no lawyer will be there to represent us on judgement day. blackchipjim
    " That we may meet in a better place after this!"

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    Quote Originally Posted by blackchipjim View Post
    As far as modern christians and picking what laws to follow it is not up to us. The new testament and Jesus spelled out clearly what to follow. The Jewish people are a different story since they don't believe in the new testment or Jesus. It's never an option to choose which you follow but sadly some try justify their actions by choosing. We as christians will be judged by our faith and actons and no lawyer will be there to represent us on judgement day. blackchipjim
    When was the last time you ate shrimp? lobster? Worked on Sunday?
    Only those who will risk going too far can possibly find out just how far one can go.


    We cannot direct the wind, we can only adjust our sails.

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    Quote Originally Posted by blackchipjim View Post
    As far as modern christians and picking what laws to follow it is not up to us. The new testament and Jesus spelled out clearly what to follow. The Jewish people are a different story since they don't believe in the new testment or Jesus. It's never an option to choose which you follow but sadly some try justify their actions by choosing. We as christians will be judged by our faith and actons and no lawyer will be there to represent us on judgement day. blackchipjim
    Interesting ideas, but Jesus never told anyone who wasn't Jewish to follow Jewish laws. None of the early Greek or Roman Christians felt they needed to change their dietary habits or observe a sabbath just because the Jewish Christians did. None of them mandated circumcision, and some did not even feel a need to become monotheistic as long as they followed the principles of Jesus along with their traditional rites.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Katweezel View Post
    Attachment 2166
    Now what could be more enticing to an ... eh, interested woman than a really hung Egyptian?
    Lol, this is one of my favorites.

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    Default Moses the Ninja

    Moses the Ninja.doc
    Bet you never knew Moses was a Ninja.
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    Default Too many foreskins

    The foreskin collector had a problem.

    1 Samuel 18 and 200 foreskins.doc
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    You go to such great extents to ridicule what you do not understand that it makes me wonder if there is not a grain of belief in each of you that you cannot seem to shake off.
    Aslan 11/1/90 - 6/15/10 Stormy 1/22/95 -8/23/10
    “There are not one hundred people in the United States who hate The Catholic Church,
    but there are millions who hate what they wrongly perceive the Catholic Church to be.”
    Bishop Fulton J. Sheen

    “It takes a very long time to become young.” Pablo Picasso

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    Default I no understand re foreskins

    Quote Originally Posted by aslan View Post
    You go to such great extents to ridicule what you do not understand that it makes me wonder if there is not a grain of belief in each of you that you cannot seem to shake off.
    The Recognition of the Absurd is a learned skill. I hope your sense of humor was intact when you read those. When I spot an absurdity, it immediately becomes apparent. Now, where were we? Oh yeah... Some King wanted lots of foreskins... Right. Shrug that off, I suppose... Now you are gonna love this next one I saved up, Az. Just for you. Cut and paste is no extents mate.
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